holy fucking shit!!!

Sex Will Make You Go Blind / Single? Under 30? You are in grave danger. Your government says so. Please, stop laughing

and i thought i was old, late in the game, when i lost my virginity at age 17. i felt so bad that i hadn't managed to do it before college. and then in college, it took me a few months to get the deed done. what a late bloomer i was. now, i see how lucky i was to be young then and not now. if i'd waited till 30 i'd have had so few partners by now i'd probably still be choosing them quite poorly. i'd still be dating cretins and would have no knowledge of my own body and oh, i cannot bear to think of the misery that would be life. i might even have the poor sense to get married again, and to the wrong person to boot! please tell me no young people take a word these lunatics say seriously. i hope they are getting some good laffs.